Speak Up,

Though I never desire to sin when under temptation, I’m thankful that even when it happens I am provided with the opportunity to learn even more how deep the love of God is. His forgiveness is too great to measure, beyond any explanation words could capture, and it is above my own understanding. In the times my sin is great and my shame even greater, the Father’s love and forgiveness trumps both.

Truly, I’ll never understand how deep Jesus’ display of affection and justice was when He hung there on the cross. May that image, and the image of His resurrection—because, indeed, my Savior rose again—always be before me.

“All the ends of the earth will remember and turn to the LORD, and all the families of the nations will bow down before Him, for dominion belongs to the LORD and He rules over the nations.” Psalm 27:28

No matter what I do in life, God will be glorified. Whether I go to church and worship with a genuine heart or I get smashed on the weekends and throw my life away—God will be glorified in the end. If I choose to submit to the Father who is above all and knows all by serving and obeying Him with every aspect of my life, He will be glorified in my worship. (Of course, my worship will never be sufficient for the glory He deserves.) But if I choose to murder and covet and steal, the Father will be glorified in His power and wrath, for the way He will deal with my sin—for the Most High is holy and pure.

This could lead me to say, “Who cares what I do then? God will glorify Himself; why must I submit to rules that keep me from doing what I feel like doing?” Yet I find it much wiser to follow the Creator in His created universe when He says, “This is not the better path, this is the only path to eternal life—to knowing Me” (John 17:3).

I don’t want to be an object of the Lord’s wrath. This means doing things I might not always choose on my own to do, obeying certain things I might not know why the Lord commands, but being an object of His mercy means laying down my pride, my own understanding, even my life. This I will gladly do for the God whom I serve, knowing that I will receive the Lord Himself as my reward. What more could I desire than Him alone? What else could satisfy my longing heart? Who else could love me more? Where else could I search for Truth?

“This is eternal life, that they may know You, the only true God, and Jesus Christ whom You have sent.” John 17:3

“If you love Me, you will keep My commandments.” John 14:5

“By this we know that we have come to know Him, if we keep His commandments.” 1 John 2:3

"True obedience means doing what God says, when He says it, how He says it should be done, until what He says is accomplished- regardless of whether you understand the reasons for it or not."

Charles Stanley

For the past three months I’ve been dating a guy who has greatly encouraged me through example to really examine myself and all that I do. As he discusses his mistakes, achievements, goals, and future plans, I begin to look to myself—am I also trying to become better, or have I become complacent on a day-to-day basis? Am I also striving to be sanctified, or am I merely avoiding sin and ultimately being neutral? Am I diligently looking at my faults and seeking ways to improve them, or am I simply accepting the fact that “that’s the way I am”?

For years I’ve been developing into the young woman that I am now, and when I’m thirty I hope that I’ll be shaped into an even better one. But the only way I can expect to improve is to stop hoping people will accept the way I am—although many thankfully do—but rather, strive for righteousness and shed the habits of my old nature.

Though it could be tolerable for me to hide under a blanket when I’m frustrated or embarrassed, it simply is not good. So while I may apologize afterward for running away from my problems, it doesn’t excuse the fact that it’s a habit that must be broken. Instead, I must learn to face the issues at hand and deal with them.

Giving up in situations I deem hopeless and never trying again tends to be another fault. I become adamant in striking down people’s encouragement over certain situations, but this cannot go on forever. Regarding this, I ought to be hopeful, even when the situation grows dim. At times I even wonder why I wouldn’t want to hear encouragement when I’ve given up; I don’t know why I want to stay down.

There are plenty of other disciplines I’m learning and working on, and I’m sure there will be lots more revealed to me as my life unfolds. When these faults seem overwhelming to me, the one thing I ought never do is give up. Christ is sanctifying me and I know my faults are not greater than His power. Though it may be difficult, my old nature will not continue to have as great an influence on me as it has.

“And He died for all, that those who live should no longer live for themselves but for Him who died for them and was raised again…Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here! All this is from God, who reconciled us to Himself through Christ and gave us the ministry of reconciliation: that God was reconciling the world to Himself in Christ, not counting people’s sins against them. And He has committed to us the message of reconciliation. We are therefore Christ’s ambassadors, as though God were making His appeal through us. We implore you on Christ’s behalf: Be reconciled to God. God made Him who had no sin to be sin for us, so that in Him we might become the righteousness of God.” —2 Corinthians 5:15, 17-21

"We were therefore buried with Him through baptism into death so that, just as Christ was raised from the dead through the glory of the Father, we too may live a new life."

Romans 6:4

Sometimes I need to be reminded of two things:

• I have died to my sinful flesh; it no longer reigns
• I have new life in Christ; I have not simply been dusted off, but I have been renewed

So when I begin to think I’m just a lousy person not worth a second glance, this verse reminds me that I have been raised to new life through the glory of the Father. My life is no longer chained down in sin that I cannot break away from—no, my life is sanctified through Christ’s blood!

Christ did not raise me to new life just to sit around day in and day out, being contently entertained with electronics and forgetting people. This life is meant to glorify the Father, putting to use all my skills and talents to bring His name praise while building relationships.

Sometimes things are easier said than done, but I don’t care how difficult this is. The Father deserves my effort as He blesses me with His grace.

Pray. Seek. Praise. Speak.

shayshayjay:

For those of you, the few and far between, who actually read this thing, please endeavor with me to pray for:

• Morocco, and all the nations to seek after and come to know the true, living God. 
• GWA and staff. We have about 5 weeks left in the school year and we need the energy and motivation more so now than ever to push through to the end. 
• My own heart preparation for coming back to the U.S. I don’t know what kind of transition it will be, but it’s always a difficult place in between cultures.

Praises:

• God has been, and IS, working in the lives of the expat youth here. They put on a beautiful dance performance to share God’s heart and speak to the nations. I was moved by their artistic worship and encouraged to do the same. 
• I purchased my ticket to America! God has been faithful to provide all I need. Plus, I will get to join my best friend and her fiance in their wedding ceremony - so stoked! 
• Summer weather - Humdulillah! 

I’m so good at starting, but I rarely finish. Whether it’s a project, a paper, a book, even a thought, my concentration and motivation to finish is lost within a short amount of time. Only by pressure do I finish something, such as a homework assignment.

This terrible habit even permeates my relationship with God. Though I know He is the only hope in a world that is passing away, there are times that my dedication to abiding in His word and setting aside specific times of prayer just falls to the wayside and my motivation to keep it on track only comes after being spurred on in a great manner. But what kind of relationship is that? That’s not exactly what Jesus meant by “abide”, so I’m left to face the fact that either I simply do not abide in Him as I ought, or I can choose to abide in Him even when I don’t feel like it or when I’m busy or when I’m tired.

I don’t want my relationship with the Father to be a roller coaster seeing the up for a mere second only to head straight down again. I want my relationship with Him to continually be growing in depth as I become more like Him. My life and circumstances may change and be unstable, but I do not want my focus to change, no matter the difficulty.

So while I don’t feel like reading or setting aside time to pray each day, it’s a step I must take if I truly desire to be close to Jesus and know where He is working. And that is my desire. May my actions show it then.

"

I will listen to what God the Lord will say;
He promises peace to his people, His saints—
But let them not return to folly.
Surely His salvation is near those who fear Him,
That His glory may dwell in our land.

Love and faithfulness meet together;
Righteousness and peace kiss each other.
Faithfulness springs forth from the earth,
And righteousness looks down form heaven.
The Lord will indeed give what is good,
And our land will yield its harvest.
Righteousness goes before Him
And prepares the way for His steps

Psalm 85: 8-13

Jesus: From Genesis to Revelation

The Bible, from cover to cover, answers the question,

I don’t think I ever savored God’s Word and spending time with Him alone as much as I do now. What a sweet, sweet Lord I follow.

“He blasphemes and claims God is His Father, that He is the Messiah.” The Pharisees were convinced in their evil hearts that Jesus was a liar, a blasphemer to the highest degree. 

So they decided to bring Him down.

This happens all the time in society—we see it throughout our lives. Someone popular is trumped by someone greater, leading the first person to get angry and decide to gossip, slander, and take down the greater person. Here, the Pharisees were doing exactly that—as they had been the “greats” in their time, Jesus came along and turned the ideas of their time upside down. He didn’t come as a strong ruler, demolishing other nations and kings or rulers, yet that is exactly what they were expecting. Instead, Jesus came and paid attention to the sick, the poor, the hungry, the widows, the children, the prostitutes, the tax collectors—the sinners of the world. This outraged the Pharisees, for they did not believe He was the Messiah since they were intently looking for someone much, much different.

Their focus was not Jesus’ focus.

So when the Pharisees and Sadducees slandered Jesus, it did not bring Him down.
When they brought Him before the high priest and Pilate, it did not phase Him. 
When they spit on Him, He did not flinch.
When they forced a crown of thorns onto His head, He was not ridiculed as they desired.
When they cried, “Crucify Him! Crucify!” He was not hesitant to keep His focus on God’s ultimate purpose.
And when they finally drove the nails into His hands and feet, convinced that this would bring Jesus Christ down to their level or below them, He responded in a much different way than we could expect: “Father, forgive them. They know not what they do.”

Those who opposed Jesus thought of what would bring them down—shame, ridicule, mockery, abandonment, and death itself—and figured it would bring Jesus down as well. But He wasn’t phased by it because His focus was not on this world. None of it was a loss to Christ compared to the joy set before Him.

If my Savior was not phased by humiliation, then I desire not be phased either. If He counted His human reputation, His support by men, His human body, and His human life as nothing, then so too I count it all as nothing.

The Pharisees stripped Jesus to have nothing, and in that, He received everything. 

“But whatever was to my profit I now consider loss for the sake of Christ. What is more, I consider everything a loss compared to the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake I have lost all things. I consider them rubbish, that I may gain Christ.” Philippians 3:7-8

Every language could exhaust itself to find an adequate description of God yet still fall short. How glorious my King is!

“Unless The Lord builds the house, those who build it labor in vain.” Psalm 127:1

Anything we do within our own power without relying on God’s power is a waste of time. Why would we ever try do anything FOR God if it is APART from Him?

Instead of forging our own way and asking God to bless it, let us seek out where He desires to bless us, submitting ourselves to follow Him wherever He may lead. He only works within His will and character, unable to work against or apart from Himself. May we consider this and align our lives with His name instead of hoping He will align Himself with us. He is the One who deserves all glory. Therefore, let our work not be done in vain but done in full reliance that The Lord is working out what we never could.

Today my Christianity and Citizenship class started discussing the ethical arguments for and against war, aggression, self-defense, and ultimately violence.

Nearly every single student except the one girl I appreciate was for violence. They all agreed self-defense is necessary, even if it means pre-emptively attacking and/or going to war. When the professor said some people don’t want to participate because they are pacifists, a couple guys said those people should leave since we’ve all “signed a contract to be part of the state and community”. My eyes rolled so hard, I’m surprised they didn’t get stuck.

As I’m continuing to develop my views on whether or not violence, even in self-defense, is ever justified, I find myself leaning more and more towards absolute pacifism. Listening to the students argue that it’s for the sake of protection and safety only caused me to question how they can argue that from a biblical standpoint—because I certainly see prophets being imprisoned, apostles and believers of the New Testament being flogged, crucified, imprisoned, beat, stoned, and thrown into boiling hot oil without fighting back in a violent manner. Christ Himself was silent during His trial and did not fight back when they crucified Him. 

Though one could argue Christ had a specific purpose—He literally came to die on the cross; if He fought back, He would not be fulfilling His purpose. But that only leads me to consider that maybe Jesus is a bit more concerned about His ultimate purpose than about my safety. He’s more focused on the life to come than He is about this one—I’m not going to live here forever.

I simply do not see anywhere in the Bible where violence was advocated except in very specific matters, as seen in the Old Testament. Considering we’re not in a Holy War and as Americans are not a land of God’s chosen people, I would boldly say we don’t have any justification for bombing other countries, ordering drone strikes, or shooting and killing innocent civilians. 

On a much more personal level, I don’t believe in fighting back if I am ever personally attacked. If I am living a life of obedience out of my love for God, then nothing I do will ever warrant a need for me to act in a violent and aggressive manner. As I have read about and heard countless stories of missionaries traveling overseas only to be killed instantly or within weeks or months, I consider they trusted God to rescue them—whether it would be physically in this life, or spiritually in the next. If my focus is on eternity with Christ, why would I be so eager to attack another person, regardless of whether or not it’s self-defense, to stay here?

And finally, in the Old Testament the command was given “an eye for an eye”. This was a measure to stop the brutality that went on in those times—the punishments were so uneven that God demanded they change to be deserving of the crime committed. But when Jesus came He brought an even greater, more merciful command: “Love your enemy.” How could I ever hope to love my enemy if I am bombing him—and I’ve never met him—or shooting him or punching him for the sake of my own well-being?

Just a thought.

Today I found out Ashley, who I’ve always thought to be a year or two older than me, is actually a year younger. She said her birthday was approaching and she would be twenty-one. Shocked, I exclaimed, “But I’m twenty-two! You’re older!” Once I got over the shock of her being younger, I realized I hadn’t really considered the fact that I’m twenty-two now.

At first I was bummed over it. Getting older means getting more bills and a job and making harder life decisions and moving on from people I love as they do the same.

But then my thoughts looked back, away from the future and onto the past. In a split second my last few years flashed through my mind and I was taken aback by how much I’ve grown.

I once was so afraid of going off to college, but step by step I’ve thrived while being in the stage of life. For all the years I was so timid or fearful of what others thought of me or how I might fail, the Father has spoken over and again that He has not given me a spirit of timidity, but rather a spirit of power. Even now I’m stepping beyond my comfort zone—with excitement, not reluctance—to search for an internship to do this summer. 

Small steps have lead me to where I am now, which still isn’t anything to praise if I stopped now, but I’m not where I was before. Praise God for that, the One who has pushed and prodded and called me to things greater than myself, to join Him in His global purpose. Hallelujah to the One who has provided growth in my life and stayed with me throughout my stubborn moments and fearful attitude.

By God’s grace, I can say my efforts have not been in vain.